momydu
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� 2002-08-30 Panic I miss San Jose in a big way. This morning when speaking to my sissy, I started to miss it even more. Not that it isn't nice here, right outside of Modesto, but I miss the city, the stuff to do, the buildings, the airplane noise, etc... I miss the lovely weather, and my favorite street around the corner from my old apartment, that is so beautiful in the Fall when all the leaves turn. I guess the truth is, I am in a bit of a depression. I guess I have been since we moved here. I don't like to complain, because we live in a lovely house, in a nice area, and we are doing OK financially, but things just aren't quite right. Anyway, I had myself a panic attack the other night. I woke up in the middle of it, my heart racing, my feet and hands cold and tingly, and hyperventilating. My sister pointed out to me what a coincidence it is that I have my first panic attack in over a year, just after I get back in touch with my Dad. I hope that isn't it. Maybe it is that. Maybe it is my Dad plus all of the stress we are having over our car that needs repaired. Gosh, am I am downer today or what? I am sorry. I am going to work myself out of this funk. Tonight we are taking my boy to stay the night at my sisters. She and her husband are taking him to the zoo tomorrow. They had my girl alone last month, and now it is his turn. So, after we drop him off, we are going to take my girl to the video store, let her pick any movie she wants(nothing "R" of course), get popcorn, and watch it just the three of us. Tomorrow we will hopefully do our yard sale, and then go bike riding before picking up my sweet boy. OK, I am going to go get him packed now.
I love you forever - 2007-10-04
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