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2001-09-23

Almost two weeks

I am feeling a bit better now, but not all the way. I forced myself to stop taking Nyquil, so I could actually function as a human today. I read the paper today, which I haven't done since the tragedy. I think it was a mistake to read it. I am now once again overwhelmed with sadness. I know it is not o.k. to forget what happened, but I have found a way to live without it being on my mind every second, and now I am back to how it was before. I just keep going back to the idea of, is there anything I can do? Does that sound silly? I just want to help in some little way, you know? And now, to be afraid to send my kids to school, just in case God forbid something should happen. I just can't make sense of this. Tomorrow I have to send my boy to preschool, and my girl to school, and probably have a continuous panic attack until they are safe at home again. I think for now I will just go tuck them in, and say our prayers.

previously next

I love you forever - 2007-10-04
Breeana and Mom - 2007-09-25
First baby - 2007-09-19
The results - 2007-07-31
12 dasy until work - 2007-07-29